


I Wish You Would

by minjiyoo



Category: Dreamcatcher (Korea Band)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Light Angst, Relationshit, What am I doing, jiyoo, maybe i'll just add more when my braincells work, this is a mess, why am i writing this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:13:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26250217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minjiyoo/pseuds/minjiyoo
Summary: There were insecurities that simple apologies couldn't fix
Relationships: Kim Minji | JiU/Kim Yoohyeon
Comments: 2
Kudos: 71
Collections: DreamCatcher Taylor Swift Ficfest 2k20





	I Wish You Would

**Author's Note:**

> just a very rushed and messily done fic because I want to write for jiyoo and when i say messily, i mean it.

_“I wish you were right here_   
_Right now, It's all good_   
_I wish you would”_

_— I wish you would, Taylor Swift_

* * *

Yoohyeon knew this was a bad idea, not an option she'd choose even if she's left with none but then again, she wasn't very good with choices so yes, maybe this was set to be done, sooner rather than later. She tapped a foot on the ground, waiting for a particular blue head to come pick her up. She had checked herself out on the front camera of her phone just to make sure she looked decent. It felt ridiculous but she wanted to impress. 

There was a small ding to her right and the door opened very slowly to reveal Yubin already looking a tiny bit of tipsy. She wanted to point that out, but her nervousness wouldn't let her thoughts focus on one thing, so she saved it for another time. 

"Yoohyeon!" Yubin had her hair in a ponytail, fringes like curtains to hide her round eyes that looked nothing less innocent despite the redness from the alcohol. "You could have knocked!" And it wasn't Yubin if she didn't, at least, nag. 

"I--" The reasons died down in Yoohyeon's throat as she peeked inside, past Yubin's shoulder. She caught a glimpse of Siyeon on the couch, her hair colored similarly to Yubin. Beside her was a purple head, someone Yoohyeon could recognize by heart. She couldn't help but wince at how fast her heart was beating against her ribs. She wanted to vomit. Her feet threatened to run.

"It's okay." Yubin assured, having to read the anxiety in the way Yoohyeon fidgeted with the hem of her button up that took the taller girl ages to pick. "She's been looking for you." 

Yoohyeon didn't know if she should feel relieved but she did move forward and inside, so slowly that Yubin had to push her softly. "Yoohyeon's here!" 

Heads turned to her, familiar faces welcomed her, ones she had painted at the back of her mind and at one point, tried to forget. She mentally panicked. Maybe she could still escape and take her time to get ready? Or not— Bora was the first to run to her, tackling her to a hug that almost made them fall if Yoohyeon wasn't quick to hold her ground. "I missed you, stiff giant!" Yoohyeon would have retaliated if it was at a different time and situation and she usually would but despite the insult, she knew Bora meant what she had said. It's been ages. 

Gahyeon quickly took Bora's place as soon as the latter moved back and then Handong regarded her with a warm kiss on the forehead. She had to tiptoe to do so. Yoohyeon couldn't help but smile but not for long.

She turned to her side, to where the others were sitting. If she was to be honest, she'd rather not meet them. 

"Hi," Siyeon's was the first to acknowledge her. In fact, she wasn't sure because her mind refused to process anything. "Long time no see." 

Yoohyeon gulped, stuck. "H-hi…" She didn't know exactly what she had to do. 

She didn't expect Siyeon to walk towards her, to pull her to a hug, to tell her how much she missed her and to tell her she was sorry. Perhaps an apology because the older girl had chosen sides after the bump, had chosen to side with someone that wasn't Yoohyeon after being friends with her the longest. 

Yoohyeon couldn't find the right to be mad. 

\- 

_ "This is stupid, Yoohyeon !"  _

_ The door closed with a loud thud behind Minji, feet trudging as she walked to where Yoohyeon was standing, in the middle of the living room. They didn't even have the thought of turning the lights on, making the moonlight passing through the slightly ajar windows the only source of illumination inside the tiny space. And it did feel tiny. The air was heavy with words that hurt.  _

_ "How was it stupid? I saw her kissing you!" And Yoohyeon was anything but mad. She wasn't even sure if she was being completely logical, but her mind was clouded, and she couldn't think properly.  _

_ "She wasn't kissing me!" Minji's voice was just as loud, her voice booming, strained, through the walls.  _

_ "Was she wiping something from your face using her lips then?"  _

_ Yoohyeon knew there were better ways to talk things out, knew she had to stop herself from overthinking things but she wasn't really the best when it comes to emotions or decisions or confidence and she knew it was just her insecurities talking but she couldn't seem to stop.  _

_ "We were just hugging! She was—" Minji tried to reach out. Her hands dropped faster than she was able to lay them on Yoohyeon's shoulders. Minji frowned, disappointment etched on her face. _

_ "That doesn't make it better!" And Yoohyeon knew she would have things to regret late on.  _

_ "What the fuck is wrong with you?"  _

_ Minji had tears in her eyes. It felt like a slap from a broken trust that seemed to be not there even from the start.  _

_ "You were cheating on me!"  _

_ Yoohyeon said, yelled, before even thinking and she watched Minji choke on her tears.  _

_ "I was not." Minji's voice was barely there. "How can you accuse me of that, Yoohyeon ?" She breathed out, hands shaking on her sides. "That fucking hurts."  _

_ Yoohyeon had her apologies ready at the tip of her tongue, ready to spill them out but she didn't.  _

\- 

Minji. 

Yoohyeon was left to greet Minji four months after the last time. It had been four months since they agreed to take what Yoohyeon called  _ 'a break ' _ . Minji resented the idea and so did Yoohyeon but their relationship was starting to become suffocating. It wasn't as fun as it was when it started. They knew they needed it, especially Yoohyeon because there were insecurities that simple apologies couldn't fix. 

Yoohyeon could already feel heat on the corners of her eyes and she didn't expect to be so emotional. Not when she was the one who asked for this. Obviously, those months didn't do her any good. Just… longing and agony and guilt about what she could've  done better than letting things go. 

"Hello," Minji smiled at her and everything seemed to have blurred out and there's just Minji. She looked the same but felt different and Yoohyeon had the urge to check if she really was Minji, feel her skin on hers. Too bad she couldn't do that. 

Minji was as awkward as Yoohyeon was. It was painful to look at. "Hi," Yoohyeon breathed out. "How are you?" 

The older girl shrugged, "Just the same." reaching out a hand to her. Yoohyeon could see Minji's fingers trembling, lower lip caught in between her teeth to stop it from quivering and there's ache in Yoohyeon's guts from seeing it. 

Before Yoohyeon could even reach out to take the extended hand, Gahyeon accidentally pushed a bottle of unopened beer from the table. It fell down with a loud shattering sound, shocking everyone. Bora nagged right after and when she looked back to Minji, she was back to sit beside Siyeon on the couch, hands on her lap, head lowered down. 

\- 

_ "I'm moving out."  _

_ Yoohyeon should've dropped that with a warning, not during dinner while they were eating food Minji had worked hard to prepare. Minji looked like she just got run over by a truck before looking up to her, eyes filled with fear, with pain, with words she didn't quite know how to voice out.  _

_ "W-why…" Minji knew why. " Yoohyeon …"  _

_ "I need it." She sighed. "We need it."  _

_ Minji exhaled shakily, hands gripping the utensils hard that her knuckles turned white.  _

_ "I'd live with my brother. I'll… I will still pay my part on the bills. You don't need to worry about that."  _

_ "What about us?" Surely, it wasn't the bills Minji was worried about.  _

_ Yoohyeon refused to look at Minji. She was afraid of the weight of her words. She felt it on her shoulders even when it left her mouth, almost too quickly and how she wished she could take it back. "Let's… take a break."  _

_ She heard the utensils hitting the plate loudly, heard the exasperated sigh, heard the muffled sobs. She heard the words "please" and "stay". She heard Minji breaking down as she closed the door behind her.  _

_ She didn't even say goodbye. _

\- 

"Bora, you can't drink too much please I didn't bring my car!" 

"Then sleep here!" 

"I can’t!" 

Yoohyeon could hear Minji and Bora yelling at each other above some hip-hop song Yubin insisted on playing because it's her birthday and it's her house. Siyeon and Gahyeon were in the living room playing Among Us while Handong was trying to stop Yubin from downing another batch of messily mixed drinks. 

Bora was far gone. Her head slumped against the wooden table right after yelling another 'sleep here' at Minji, a bottle of beer was in between her tiny fingers. Minji was trying to wake her up. 

"I guess, she's asleep." Yoohyeon said. She didn't mean to say it aloud, though. She didn't want her presence known although that was ridiculous by how she followed Minji around, not too close but she was making sure Minji was on her line of sight. 

Minji looked up to her, cheeks a bit rosy from a few shots she had downed. She was briefly taken back to the time a single shot would knock Minji out and she had to carry her home. "I need to go home." And there was a genuine distress in her voice. “I have an early meeting tomorrow.” 

She looked behind to see the other girls trying to beat each other. Obviously heavily influenced by alcohol and she'd not entrust Minji to any of them. 

"I can take you home." 

Yoohyeon had always hated doing something before she could even think about it. She was, on most times, impulsive and often stupid. This time she was both. 

\- 

Yoohyeon knew this was also a bad idea. It was two in the morning and the cold breeze was almost painful to the skin, but it wasn't the reason she was shaking. She couldn't even feel it inside the car, to begin with. She glanced to her right and watched Minji fasten her seatbelt. She moved so comfortably around the space. Perhaps it was familiarity. After all, this car was once her own. 

"Ready to go?" Yoohyeon asked. 

"Yeah." Minji mumbled, almost inaudibly. Her eyelids were drooping, and Yoohyeon took her time watching her. 

Purple was something she had been asking Minji to get whenever she'd ask Yoohyeon for a hair color to try. Yoohyeon thought purple was ugly but it always looked good on Minji. 

"Your hair looks good on you." And how Yoohyeon hated blurting unwanted words in an unwanted conversation. 

Minji looked at her and Yoohyeon looked away, quickly starting the engine of the car. She could feel Minji's gaze burning a hole on the side of her face. 

"I know you'd say that." Minji whispered. 

Yoohyeon swallowed the invisible lump in her throat. Refusing to answer back, she hit the radio on, switching channels as the car moved smoothly (Yoohyeon could drive on this trail even without looking). 

"How have you been?" Minji asked and Yoohyeon thought thrice before answering. 

"Barely making it." 

There's a high-pitched sigh that neither of them was sure where from. Or maybe it was from Minji. The car stopped at a red light and Yoohyeon checked if Minji was still awake and she was. 

With the window down, the night light made a beautiful glow on Minji's skin and Yoohyeon took pride in calling Minji hers, or once was. 

The ride was mostly quiet, and it left a bitter taste on Yoohyeon's tongue. She didn't know what she was expecting but she had an idea in her head, and she was dying to do something about it. 

She parked before a two-storey apartment and memories came flooding in. Technically, it's still her home as she was actively paying for her parts of the bills although that wasn't something she should be proud of. She sensed Minji unfastening her seatbelt and she did the same. 

Minji hopped out faster than Yoohyeon could open the door for her and even that felt like a kick on her chest. She used to open doors for Minji, loving how the older girl looked from the car window as Yoohyeon looked down on her. 

Once out, she stood still, calculating her next step. "I…" She scratched her head and Minji watched her from where she was standing (beside a mailbox with both their names on it, messily painted in both pink and green which minji said make a terrible combination but somehow they made it look decent to stare at, not too long though because the colors were too bright). "...should go?" 

Minji shrugged. "I don't know about you." Her tone was challenging, as though she was waiting for Yoohyeon to do something or say something or Yoohyeon must have had imagined that. 

Yoohyeon didn't know either, didn't know anymore. "You have an early meeting tomorrow, right? Well it's today but yeah. I mean," 

Minji smiled and Yoohyeon felt her stomach churn. That was the first genuine smile she'd seen tonight. "I'll go then?" 

Yoohyeon nodded dumbly, pushing her hands on her pocket. "You should." 

Minji stepped back, keys already prepared on her hand. "I'm heading inside." She had just opened the door when Yoohyeon said something she was waiting to hear for four months. Her fingers shook against the doorknob, missing the keyhole twice. 

"I would love to go back to you, though." 

Minji noted the words. Yoohyeon wanted to come back, not just to the place they used to share. Yoohyeon wanted to come back to her. She let out a shaky sigh, opening the door wider. 

She turned around to face the younger girl standing from a distance. Were four months enough? Minji licked her lips, heart beating crazily in her chest. 

"You should head home, Yooh." 

Yoohyeon exhaled loudly. Only then did she really feel the cold breeze touching her skin, numbing her. She took a step back once, eyes fixed on the now closed door of Minji's house. She wasn't even aware how she started chanting words in her head, how she clasped her hands together as if she was praying, begging. 

"Please…" She mumbled through smoky breaths. The night air was surely painful to the skin but something in Yoohyeon hurt more. "...please." She didn't know what the pleas were for. 

Or maybe she did. 

"Please, come back." 

The light on the front door turned off. The curtains from the window of Minji's room, their room, shut close. 

Minji didn't come back. 

— 

"What are you on?" 

Yoohyeon shouldn't have asked Bora. The confusion in Bora's face was evident. One brow raised up in what Yoohyeon could read as annoyance or irritation. Bora and Minji were best friends, for one and that's exactly why Yoohyeon wanted to hear it more from the shorter girl. 

"I…" 

"Stop playing with her, Yoohyeon." And Bora's voice wasn't accusatory. It was softer, as if she was pleading. "She went through a lot already." 

Yoohyeon was aware of that. She carried the guilt with her every day. "I know. I…" If only she was good with words. "...want her back, Bora." 

"You shouldn't have let her go." 

Yoohyeon knew that as well. "I know. I don't take pride from that. I fucked up. I regret it. I… Fuck. I just want her back because the past four months were sad and painful and I… I just need to have her back." She breathed out, catching her breath in her throat. "She's my life." 

"We all know that." Bora said, eyes on Yoohyen's to prove she meant it. "You're just dumb." 

That brought a smile to Yoohyeon's lip, although sad. "She doesn't want me anymore." 

"I highly doubt it. She's probably trying to sort out her thoughts. Four months were long, Yoohyeon but that doesn't mean she doesn't need more time. Give it to her." 

\- 

Yoohyeon bit the inside of her cheek in nervousness. Her knuckles quickly left the wooden door after two knocks. Handong opened it. Her newly dyed red hair screaming on Yoohyeon's face. 

"You're late again!" Handong faked a glare but there was a grin on her lips. "Come in!" 

It was her intention to be late. It was hard finding time to be ready (both emotionally and physically) and true to her assumptions, Minji was already there, watching Gahyeon and Siyeon play a game Yoohyeon had no idea what with a gentle smile on her face. 

An apology to Handong but the main reason she was there was because she missed Minji so much and she knew the older girl wouldn't miss Handong's birthday. She just needed to see her. 

Bora got to her and whispered something about ' she kept asking about you' in her ear. She was pushed forward then back by Bora and she didn't know if that was what got her momentarily dizzy or if it was Minji's gaze landing on her after a swift run from her head to her toe. She hoped Minji found her outfit decent, at least. 

There was a space beside Minji on the couch for two and honestly there were plenty of seats but the way Minji moved to the side made it seem like she wanted Yoohyeon to sit beside her. So Yoohyeon did just that. She sat very carefully, making sure there was ample distance between them to not make Minji uncomfortable. 

"Hi." Minji was the first one to talk and it surprised Yoohyeon. "You look good." 

Yoohyeon fought the urge to smile but she couldn't stop herself from blushing, cheeks heating up and it made Minji laugh softly. It sounded so beautiful. 

"You too." 

Minji fell silent. Her eyes were focused on the TV screen. Gahyeon and Siyeon were yelling in front of them, arguing who won the round. It was a mess but somehow Minji managed to look perfect. She always did. 

Yoohyeon shifted on her seat, trying to look at anywhere but Minji's side profile that looked ethereal with brightness from the television bouncing off her skin. She saw Bora motioning something from a distance and her mind blanked out. 

"Okay! Who wants ice cream?" Bora asked and the girls stood up almost instantly. Siyeon almost tripped on her own feet. "Let's go to the kitchen, children!" 

Bora gave her a look, pointing to her then to Minji who just got up to follow the others. 

Yoohyeon could hear her pulse in her head. Her heart was beating so fast that it made her breathless. She could taste blood on her tongue with how hard she was biting her bottom lip. She nearly slipped. Minji walked past her then ahead and she mentally panicked. She quickly reached out, fingers wrapping on Minji's wrist. Yoohyeon looked up and she could swear her eyes were glistening when it met Minji's. "Can we talk?" 

Minji halted. Her hand was cold. She didn't say anything and Yoohyeon was starting to get the ugliest scenario in her mind. She didn't want to force anything on Minji. Not even in her most desperate state. So, she let go of Minji. 

Minji's hand fell on her side. 

"I'm sorr-" Yoohyeon's words drowned in the loud laughter from the kitchen. 

Minji moved back and then down, beside her, on the couch and Yoohyeon couldn't seem to believe her eyes. 

"You actually wanna talk now, huh." Minji said. Her words were laced with humor but Yoohyeon felt bitter. 

"I was never really good at it." She confessed. "Until now." 

Minji remained quiet and the brief silence was too loud. It rang in Yoohyeon's ears in a painful way. She figured out that she wouldn't be given any chance but now. 

"I… I know I made terrible choices that brought us to where we are right now, to how we are right now." She took the courage to look at Minji and unlike a while ago, the latter was looking back at her in a way that made her heart clench painfully. "... and I won't be able to bring back the time and fix it." 

Yoohyeon's lips quivered and she licked her bottom lip to make it stop. It only took another second before a tear rolled down her cheek, unwanted. She felt naked. The emotions she held for so long coming out bare. 

"You were nothing but good to me and at some point, I thought I don't deserve you. I always dwell with the idea of you finding someone else to replace me because you deserve so much more." 

"Yoohyeon-" 

Yoohyeon held up a hand to make Minji stop. She wanted to pour everything until she's left with nothing to drop. Finding the courage, she held one hand to Minji, palm up, shaking and she nearly sobbed when Minji placed her hand on hers. The purple head's hand was just as cold. 

Yoohyeon let Minji's fingers fill the gap of her hand just like how they would before and she felt ecstatic, partly dazed, by how they fit like they were made for one another. 

She breathed in and then out, her chest rumbling. She brought Minji's hand to her lips, feeling Minji's grip on her hand as her breath fans Minji's skin. "I missed you so much." Yoohyeon couldn't even see Minji properly anymore with tears blurring her sight. 

She heard a sob in return. It was too soft as though it wasn't there, but she heard it, felt Minji's tears as her other hand reached out to touch her face, mapping the features she memorized by heart. Minji leaned into her touch. 

_ This is really it.  _

"Come back to me, please?" 

And Yoohyeon knew it was a ridiculous question when she was the one who left and it was proven by how Minji chuckled, so adorably. Yoohyeon tried to make out Minji's face through the tears. The older girl was watching her with a look Yoohyeon recognized as love. 

"What if this happened again?" There was fear in Minji's voice as she asked. "What if you left me again?" 

"I will never. I can't live without you." Surely, Yoohyeon can but the pain of living without Minji beside her was nothing better than life being taken from her. 

"I'm scared." 

Minji had the right to be. 

Yoohyeon had wasted too much time already trying to figure out her own fear and dealing with it. She caressed Minji's face lovingly. Their position wasn't the most comfortable with how her feet were crossed against Minji's left thigh but if it was to be as close to Minji, Yoohyeon didn't mind the burning in her legs. She tucked the purple strands blocking Minji's eyes at the back of the latter's ear. It was just then that she noticed Minji wearing one of her favorite lenses. Minji was looking back at her through the older girl's galaxy eyes. Minji was gorgeous. 

"Let me take your fear away." Yoohyeon cringed from her own words but it earned her a smile from Minji, so she was ready to say more. "Let me take care of you this time." And she meant it. If she was to be given another chance (and she really wished she would), she would take her time making Minji feel that she was worthy of her time, her affection, her love… of her. 

The love was there. It was strong. Yoohyeon could sense it in the way Minji grazed her thumb on Yoohyeon's knuckle to soothe her. Yoohyeon could see it in the way Minji looked at her like she had the world in front of her. Yoohyeon could feel it in the way Minji leaned closer to her, her free hand reaching out then up to trace the curve of Yoohyeon's lip before she gently pressed her lips on them. 

Kissing Minji was never underwhelming. It always felt surreal. It felt like a firework was lit in her core. With Minji's forehead on her own, Yoohyeon could feel Minji breathing on her. Yoohyeon could feel Minji's lashes flutter on her cheeks. 

Minji was love drunk and it looked beautiful. 

"I wish you would trust us more this time." Minji said in a hushed tone as though she was coming from a high. 

Yoohyeon could really taste her heart on her throat. She smiled, pressing yet another kiss on Minji's slightly agape lips and then one more and some more until catching their breaths was impossible to do. 

She broke so many promises even back when she was little, but she would keep this. "I promise, I will." 

Minji sighed and it was one that had her shoulders feel lighter. She had an idiotic smile on her face, and she couldn't seem to erase it and not like she wanted to. 

_ "I wish you would." _

"I would." 

**Author's Note:**

> i'm @minjiyoo on twitter!


End file.
